Staying Here 9-12
by AllytheVamp
Summary: Doyle finds some answers and nearly loses it...(read the first two before this one)


**Staying Here**

**By Allison Reilly**

**(*= The song "The Sweetest Thing" is by U2 and I take no credit for it whatsoever. I don't own it neither!)**

! This wasn't supposed to be up until I update, but aw well. Here it is anyway!

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Chapter Nine: The Midas Touch

Doyle

I waited until I was sure Cordelia was asleep and then tiptoed out the door. I had never ever seen her cry like that. She had been clinging onto me like I had just saved her life. I wondered what she could have possibly dreamed that would scare her like that.

Needless to say, I'd gotten what I wanted. She'd actually cried in my arms.

I lay down on the lumpy bed in my room and stared at the ceiling. I figured she wouldn't tell me what the dream was about. She never ever told me about anything. She was always hiding behind the usual Cordelia-like wall. I wished I could break through. There was no way she'd talk to me.

I shook my head and buried it under my pillow. I had to stop thinking. I'd never get any sleep.

***

I vaguely remembered Cornelia's dream as I blinked open my eyes that morning. I smiled softly to myself as I heard her bustling around in the kitchen. She always made coffee, every single morning. She had once said that it was a routine of hers.

I rubbed my eyes as I walked towards the kitchen. The TV was on, playing news about some riot downtown. I rolled my eyes. You can never escape the ones who think it's a living to make trouble. Even on some fabulous island, far away. Of course I was a bit like that, looking for trouble, but I didn't purposely create any!

Cordy was racing back and forth between two tiny kettles. She had a steaming cup in her hand which she offered to me with a cheery smile. "Morning Sleepy! While you were in your usual morning coma, I decided to make us coffee. I could only find those coffee maker grinds, which make no SENSE because we don't have a coffee maker! I don't know what they were thinking with THAT, but..."

She was babbling. I recognized this. She always did this when she was nervous. I put a hand on her shoulder to silence her. She got quiet and shot me a strange look. Almost like she was scared of me. I hated that look instantly.

"Delia," I asked slowly, keeping her eyes. "Are you alright?"

For a brief second it looked as though she was going to cry. Her lip quivered slightly and she turned away from me. I could see her trembling a bit. She shook my hand off and started to move again.

"I'm fine." she scoffed. "And my nickname is Cordy not Delia'."

She was doing it again. She was shutting me out. Anytime, in usual circumstances, I'd bother her until she blurted out her problems. Then I'd try to help her. Usually that was the way we worked. Usually it was routine, but I guessed that this time, it must have been something huge that she couldn't tell me. I understood...it just completely deflated me. I couldn't stand knowing she was uncomfortable talking to me about this. Pushing probably wouldn't work in this case.

"Delia suits you." I offered dejectedly. Even when she ranted at me (which was pretty much everyday) about things, she never actually let me in. Everyone always let Angel in. They seemed to gravitate towards him when they were in need! What the heck was I doing wrong? Didn't she trust me at all?

Cordy's jaw was clenched in that dangerous way. "Have your coffee. I'm getting ready to go." She turned and marched out of the kitchen, leaving her pots still on. I flicked them off and sighed. Then what she said hit me.

"Go?" I yelled, towards her room.

"To the club, stupid!" she yelled back.

Oh yeah. The stupid mission. Right at that moment I wanted to drop everything and corner Cordy. I wanted desperately to have her confide in me the way she confided in others. I never seemed to get that chance, to really get through to someone. She was so difficult! She cried in my arms and then she acted like nothing even happened. So, even when I was her shoulder to cry on she didn't really care, it seemed.

And what about Angel? I hadn't even told him what was going on! What in the world could those freaks be doing to him?

I sipped my coffee, feeling lost. It tasted lumpy...kind-of bitter...kind-of salty.

I spit it out.

Then I started choking.

"CORDY!" I managed. "WHAT'S _IN _THIS?"

***

Cordy flattened out the crumpled piece of paper where I had written down the name of the club. I had been in alot of pain after the vision and I wasn't sure if I had seen correctly. I noticed how messy my handwriting had been and shook my head. Never really had a knack for cursive.

"The Golden T." She recited, skeptically. "Doyle, are you sure they would name a stylish, tropical island type club something so odd?"

"Hey, I didn't send myself that vision and the PTB haven't been known to make misprints when it comes to a name," I told her as we walked along the island's sidewalk. There were barely any cars and the people were so friendly, that it was hard to believe any evil could come from here.

I stared at the waves as we strolled along, fingering the cross Cordy had to remind me to keep on. The water was lapping at the shore slowly, it's swooshing almost hypnotic. The tropical birds were waddling around quietly and surfers were paddling out to catch some of the waves. It was so peaceful at that moment, walking with Cordy. I wished we didn't have to find anyone and we could just hang out on the beach.

That was another reason I shouldn't have brought her. She was distracting me.

Finally we turned to the corner and Cordy starting pointing and patting my arm. I was still staring longingly at the waves when she sent a sharp kick my way. I thought my leg was broken for a moment and I stared at her in confusion, clutching my throbbing thigh.

"What was that fer-?"

She grabbed my face and pushed my head toward a large, expensive looking place that had a banner over it in gold letters saying "The Midas Touch ~ The Best Club on Hofner".

"That, is the place." Cordy informed me, strutting towards the seemingly shining building.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her back, as gently as possible, considering the speed she was going.

"Delia, we don't know that. And anyway, you-" I stopped talking when she gave me the strangest look I'd ever seen. Her face was suddenly flushed and her eyes had a light in them that I'd never seen directed at me before.

"What?" I asked, confused. "Do I have something on my face?" I started feeling around my face, looking for something embarressing.

Cordy giggled and shook her head. Her smile lit up her whole, previously cool, face. I loved that woman's smile.

"No, no. It's just..." She paused at bit her lip. "You called me Delia again."

I blinked. I hadn't even given it any thought. It was a name that I thought really suited her and it never really occurred to me that she may not like it. "Did you not like that name?" I asked softly.

Cordy looked alittle aghast that I had asked her and she averted her eyes, flushing even more. I felt a bit giddy, realizing she was embarrassed. Only people she liked did that to her.

What was I thinking? She couldn't be interested in me!

Could she?

She was sure giving me a look like she was. I loved the way her eyes looked when she was unsure. Like she was a child, afraid of admitting a sin to someone or a deer in headlights. Cordy had the loveliest eyes I'd ever seen. Why couldn't she ever admit anything? She couldn't even tell me she liked the nickname I'd used. I edged closer, forcing her to look at me. The same intensity I'd felt during supper the night before came back full force as I stared into those pools of brown. I knew how dangerous this was, how many questions it would bring up...

But, as our foreheads touched and we started drifting, I wasn't thinking about any of that.

Suddenly a thundering yell erupted from the club and Cordy and I jumped apart. A tall man, dressed in a gold suit came skidding to a stop in front of me.

"Thank heavens you're here! I thought you would never arrive! We aren't paying you to sit around you know!" He grabbed my arm and shoved something to Cordy. "Here have this ticket for a day. Alright the deal is-"

"Hey wait a second fella, I'm just, hey-!"" I stammered as he dragged me into the club through a small door that was hidden from the public eye. Cordy just shook her head and I caught her walking to the club as the doors shut. I was still shaking off the effects our almost kiss had on me. I couldn't even think straight as he babbled on and on and on. Then suddenly, these strange men were grabbing my clothes and shoving me into this incredibly odd looking gold suit. Then a bunch of girls came up and started putting powder on me and other things. I pushed them all away, trying desperately to tell them it was a mistake. None of them listened, assuming I was joking. Then they told me to just go out and sing a few songs, then the DJ would take over.

Suddenly I found myself on a huge stage with a band behind me and a mic in front of me. I was instantly mesmerized by the way the entire interior shone. Gold was everywhere! The chairs were a gold color as were the tables, and banners of gold decorated the walls. Tiny threads decorated with gold beads seemed to float in the air. Even the people were dressed in some gold. It was quite a sight in it's shimmering glory.

Then I realized where I was. I was mistaken for a singer. I coughed softly and the mic let out this horrible noise. People winced and I heard cries over the deafening tone. When it stopped, I grabbed the thing again and laughed nervously.

"Sorry, uh, sorry bout that, all." I sounded like an idiot. Everyone in the place was staring at me. I started to sweat. "Ok, I uh...here's the deal..."

I watched the people tapping their feet impatiently and realized there was no way out of this except to get it over with. So I smiled, hoping I looked charming and made a huge mistake.

"I kinda have a bit of a sore throat today. So I'm just gonna sing one thing for you and we'll get someone else up here ok?"

Dead silence. Someone coughed and a couple of people yawned.

Oh man...someone was going to pay.

I turned to the band. "Do you guys know 'The Sweetest Thing' by U2?" It was the only song that I could think of.

They nodded. Then I turned back to the mike as they began to play. People smiled and got out of their chairs to dance. I felt the sweat drop onto my back as I started to warble out the song.

"_My love she throws me like a rubber ball..._" The band came in with the back up and I started to relax a bit, thinking that as soon as this bleedin' song was over I'd be free to get back to Cordelia. That's when she just popped into my head. I saw her face in my minds eye and smiled as I sang, the notes becoming clearer. Of course I was just awful, but nobody seemed to care. They just assumed it was because of my sore throat ( I hoped). I was going to get through this for Cordy. I felt as though I was singing to her and her alone.

Then as the last few notes came out of my mouth, I saw her. She was sitting at a table just staring at me on stage. She had the biggest smile on her face and she looked as though she'd been laughing. I couldn't honestly blame her. I smiled back and kept her eye as I finished. The crowd gave me very hesitant applause and most people were rolling on the floor, laughing and snorting like pigs, as I left the stage.

I had to get out of that suit.

And give that tall guy a good punch in the nose.

***

When I did finally get out of that (and believe me I got a good talking to, and wasn't getting paid, like it mattered), I had to wade through the wads of people on the floor just to stumble to Cordy's table. She was chatting with someone I couldn't recognize. Her head was facing Cordy so I couldn't see her face. Her raven hair was long and looked perfect, despite the humidity in the club. Cordy smirked at me when I sat down.

"Hey, Dr. Fear." she teased

I mock-glared at her, tiredly. " Yeah, well we had technical difficulties. Who's your friend?"

The girl turned to me and I froze. Her eyes here a perfect emerald green. Her skin was milky white and looked amazingly smooth. I instantly wanted to reach out and run my hands over her face. Her black hair fanned over her shoulders in silky waves. She was the most gorgeous thing since Cordelia. I managed to blurt out my name.

"I'm...uh...Doyle is my name." I stuttered.

Charming Doyle. Minimal drool.

The girl smiled and giggled a bit. "I'm Jadine."

She held out a slender hand and I breathlessly kissed it. She smiled again and I did so too. That's when Cordelia cleared her throat, startling me back into reality.

"If I could just interrupt this cheesefest for one second," She said briskly. "I just wanted to let you know that she knows about the whole thing with the crystal."

I shot Jadine a surprised look and she nodded, her eyes becoming darker. She looked almost as if she hadn't wanted me to know. Cordy gestured when she wasn't looking for me to talk to her. I shot her a 'wait a minute' look when she turned back around. She glanced back and forth briefly and leaned in closely to us. Her presence sent a strange electric chill through me. I could nearly feel her breath on my face and I was mesmerized by her eyes.

"I really shouldn't be talking to you about this," she whispered. "There are people here who would kill anyone to get to my grandmother. She has all the crystals. She's had them for years and stopped searching at the last one, because she got too old. Then the Genshj found us and my mother died protecting her." Jadine's face clouded and she looked down for a moment.

I set a sympathetic hand on her shoulder. She smiled gratefully.

"It was so hard. I've had to take care of her and she keeps sending me places. She gets these premonitions and sends me wherever she thinks the thing is going to happen. I've tried so hard to understand her magic but I just can't. She sent me here to find you guys." She glanced at the door worriedly. "Look, she wants to see you, but you guys have to be really careful ok? No one can know where she is! These Genshj are really really dangerous and I can't understand exactly what it is that's going on..."

I listened to this, feeling optimism rise in me. I couldn't believe that on my first day on this stupid island, we'd already found our connection to that person who had all the pieces of the puzzle. Well, almost all. I felt nearly giddy. Now we were one step closer to finding Angel.

"I didn't know there was more then one crystal." Cordelia commented.

"Not many do," Jadine replied. "Only the Genshj and my race."

"What race is that?" She asked.

Jadine smiled. "A race you'll never know. Now we can go to see her now or later when the club closes."

"Let's go now." I urged her, ignoring her mysterious answer. I was dying to get out of that club. The gold was hurting my eyes. "The faster we get this over with, the faster we can get my friend."

"They have your friend?" Jadine asked, a frightened look on her face.

"They took him, cause I wouldn't give up the crystal." I said numbly. "This is half to get him and half to help save the world."

"Then let's go," We all rose from the table and walked towards the doors. "I hope she's what you're looking for."

As we walked out I caught Cordy's eye. She looked at me as if somehow I had disappointed her. It made no sense and gave me a sinking feeling in my chest. All my previous enthusiasm drained away into nothing. I tried to smile at her, but she only bit her lip and looked away.

She started walking faster.

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Chapter Ten: The Swirling Colors

Cordelia

_Angel didn't think he had ever screamed. Really screamed. Not just yelped in pain, but really truly screamed. He was lying in the shadows shivering with cold. He felt like he was covered in dirt as he lay there, the sunlight barely touching him, but so near he could taste it. He could feel the evil on his soul, eating away at him slowly. He looked into the ceiling and hoped with everything in him that Doyle would know it was all a marvelous trap._

***

I was going to be sick. I felt as if there were things moving around in my stomach. I kept watching him. He would look over at her then shake his head, then do it again. Why was he so fascinated by her anyway? I felt as though someone was smacking me in the face when he kissed her hand like that.

When he had been singing...man at first he was awful. He looked so nervous and out of place that I couldn't help feeling a bit sorry for him. Then he looked at me and I got this feeling. It was the strangest thing I've ever felt. It was suddenly as if he didn't really mind embarressing himself just for me. It was like he was singing to me. My first inclination had been to laugh my head off, and I had, but then it seemed ok somehow. Considerably less cheesy and just plain sweet.

After the DJ had started a new song and Doyle had walked out, I had caught sight of this strange girl with the most shocking green eyes I'd ever seen. It was freaky, but I got this feeling about her...that I had to talk to her. So I flagged her over and she was nice enough, so I just blurted out what we were looking for. She told me that she had been looking for Doyle for her grand-mother. That was a bit unsettling to hear, but I figured that since she was all wrapped up in this Genshj garbage there had to be a magical element to her.

Then Doyle had come and started fawning all over her. I thought I was going to bank him in the head with my chair!

Had I dreamed that almost kiss outside the club? I didn't know what had come over me out there. I tried to reason that maybe it was the heat of the moment or the fact that I was deliriously in love with the name 'Delia'. It really fit and when Doyle said it...it just got to me. I refused to believe that the thought of kissing him made me weak in the knees suddenly...

Now we were driving in Jadine's little jeep to her grandma's house. I sat in the back with my hands folded. The seats were old and scratchy and I was trying hard not to breathe in the smell. It wasn't the old-sock smell that you usually find in cars, but the strange scent of some sort of flower. Breathing it in constantly was making my lungs burn.

Doyle was seated by Jadine and was laughing and chatting with her. I couldn't help watching his face. I had never noticed the way his cheeks dimpled when he smiled. It was strange how his laugh suddenly raced through me and made me feel a crazy warmth inside. His eyes were SO blue... It was fun just watching him talk.

He suddenly caught my eye in the mirror above his head. He smiled softly.

I blinked and then, blushing with embarrassment, looked away. Why was I staring at Doyle???

_Why don't you just admit it, Cordy?,_ a little voice asked. _Why are you so afraid to get close to him? You may just not be able to stop yourself from..._

"We're here!" Jadine's voice invaded my thoughts and I shook back to reality as the jeep shuttered to a stop.

I climbed out and sucked in a breath. It was my dream house. Tall, Victorian, looked pretty small but stylish and cozy and it had the most beautiful garden. There was a small path that was surrounded by lush pink lilies and other tropical flowers. It was like someone had taken the loveliest shades of paint in the world and thrown buckets all over the green bushes. Doyle whistled.

"You the gardener?" he asked as she led him to the door.

Jadine shook her head. "My grandmother takes care of all the flowers. She's surprisingly strong in her old age." Her face turned serious. "Look, you have to be very careful around her. I don't know if she'll trust you and she can be quite jumpy...just don't hurt her! And don't let anyone in who you don't recognize!"

Doyle looked deep in her eyes and I felt sick as he touched her shoulder and talked softly to her. I whirled away and began to walk away from them.

Suddenly, I felt Doyle's hand on my arm. I turned around, trying my best to look impatient. My features softened when I saw his worried look.

"Del...Cordy," he hesitated, his grip wavering. He looked as if he wanted to say more. I felt myself suck in an expectant breath.

"Stay here ok?" he finished.

Disgusted by that anti-climax, I brushed his hand away. "Think about it Doyle, this is a fairly large island and I don't know anyone aside from my present company and creepy-cavity-guy. Where else would I go?"

Doyle looked alittle taken aback. Then he shook his head and walked into the house. I sighed and began walking down the small path that led to the rest of the garden. Jadine drifted beside me, her green eyes shining in an unsettling way.

"Doyle's really something isn't he?" she said dreamily.

"He's the living end." I growled feeling one set of pearly whites grind the other.

She shot me a surprised look. "Do you guys have a thing?"

I bit my lip and shook my head furiously. "We have nothing. How can you even ask that?"

Jadine shot me a skeptical look. "Are you sure? The way he looked at you was...are you sure?"

"Yes!" I snapped. Then I paused and said timidly, "What look?"

"I don't know...he just kept looking at you." Jadine looked as if that irritated her.

I allowed myself a tiny smidge of satisfaction. Then it disappeared into the panic and fear.

I'd always known that he had a bit of a crush on me, but I never really thought it was anything serious. I wanted so badly to open up, but I had only done that once in my whole life and the next thing I'd known, my heart had gotten ripped out. I'd always been hesitant. Even growing up the only person I had, it seemed, was myself. I learned to just keep everyone away by being the bitca that no one wanted to mess with. It was safer so that I could feel whatever I wanted without having to explain myself to everyone I knew. I grew to loathe myself for doing it. I got so far-gone that I couldn't get anyone to even want to help me. Buffy tried, but she had ruined so much for me that it prevented me seeing the good she'd done. The good she wanted to do never got done, cause I wouldn't let her.

Now standing in that garden it crashed down on me how scared I was. What was I going to do? I was beginning to see Doyle in the strangest way, Angel was gone and may even have been dead, this girl was trying to take Doyle away (even though I didn't exactly _own_ him, but I still saw it that way) and her grandma might kill him and I had no one to talk to!

Well, that wasn't exactly true.

I had Doyle.

So what was I waiting for?

I looked up when I heard a strange sound. It was like a pin dropping if the sound weren't so incredibly inaudible. Jadine got a funny look in her eyes and started backing away. She smiled at me when I gave her a funny look.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

"I just thought...nevermind." She smiled lightly.

"Are you leaving?" By her body language, she was about to bolt.

"I need to go pick up some stuff. I hope you don't mind." Jadine smiled. "I know my grandma's who you're looking for." With that she was gone.

I shook my head, alittle spooked. I turned to go and stopped dead when I saw it.

It's white marble was weather stained and slightly chipped. The water trickled over the edges of it in small tinkling bursts. Soft coloured petals floated in the pool. It was the exact fountain from my dream. Every detail I remembered was right before my eyes. I felt weak suddenly and a strong foreboding flooded me.

Suddenly I heard the loud smack of wood against brick and Doyle came running into the garden his eyes wild with panic.

"CORDY GET AWAY FROM THERE!" he screamed.

I spun around in confusion and the bushes burst open. In the haze of petals, the guy with sunglasses came out pointing a gun at my head. I gasped, when Doyle was suddenly there blocking him from me. I began to shake instinctively grabbing his hand.

"Stay away from her Raine!" Doyle snarled, his voice choked with panic.

"Why should I, lad? You know my way. If I can't get you, I get your little play-toy." Raine cocked the gun toward me again and Doyle let out an animal's howl as he tackled him to the ground. An ear-splitting gun shot rang out and I screamed falling hard onto my knees.

An acrid stench flooded my nose and I felt slimy hands pull me to my feet. I stared into yellow eyes and shrieked in shock. The slim demons flung me against the fountain and I fell almost into the water. I writhed and they laughed as they held me there. Doyle wasn't doing too bad, considering the necklace was fueling him, but I could see him bleeding and I struggled to get to him. The worst thing was that I had forgotten my necklace in the hotel...

Suddenly, a strange old woman appeared on the porch. She shouted something about Doyle having to save them and that her work would soon be done.

That's when I saw Raine come at me. His face was livid and scratched and he pushed me into the water. A million icy knives stabbed my body and my lungs burned as I thrashed to get out. I couldn't hear anything but the water splashing as the demons held me there and the water rose. I had my eyes squeezed shut. I heard a strange sound and I felt light-headed. I swear I saw my life flashing before my eyes. I was just about to breathe in water when I opened my eyes and I saw the sky. Gone were the clouds and bright swirling colors flew in banners over the blue. For a moment I forgot I was about to die and I lost myself in the brightness and the wonder of it all. Nothing was there but the blurring, sparkling, swirling colors as I sucked in death...

Then suddenly I was lifted out and I greedily gasped in air, coughing up the liquid ice of the fountain. I had never been so happy to breathe. I felt myself shaking and incredible warmth flooded my soul when I opened my eyes and saw Doyle breathlessly staring at me. He was crying. Tears stained his eyes and he pulled me close. I sobbed into his shoulder, so confused I could have died. He had saved me again, just like the dream. I was overwhelmed when I realized how much I loved this man, how wonderful his touch felt and how much I needed to confide in him. I ran a hand over his hair, not able to let him go. I breathed raggedly, my whole soul wanting to speak, but not being able to.

"Delia," he choked. "I thought I was too late...I thought I lost you."

"Well you didn't," I croaked. "I'm staying right here."

"Cripes love, you're frozen..." he murmured. His lips were searing against my forehead.

I held on for dear life as he carried me to the little jeep, lay me in the backseat and lay a blanket over me. All I could do was watch him, as sniffling he put the keys into the ignition. Then he put his head in his arms on the wheel and I heard him as he cried. He looked so broken as his shoulders shook with sobs.

I'd never seen him look so broken...

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Chapter Eleven: The Future

Doyle

_Only 20 Minutes Before..._

I stepped into the small house, still feeling her eyes burning into me. Cordelia Chase was a complicated woman. I didn't know what it was that I had done wrong exactly, but she seemed so angry with me. I shook off the effect as best as I could as the scent of herbs and roses invaded my nose.

The house was cramped inside, books, paper, crystals and plants strewn about everywhere you looked. It was a simple house. The fluffy pale pink carpet matched the colour of the walls. The pictures depicted a beautiful girl and her mother (it looked like) smiling, looking happy and content. I stared at it, mesmerized at how vibrant the color of their eyes was.

"Aren't we so happy?" A sweet voice asked from behind me. I turned around.

The old woman had a lovely face, filled with the wisdom of her years. Her eyes were a faded emerald, a slight contrast to the shocking brightness of Jadine's. Her hair was white and fanned over her shoulders. She smiled a knowing smile, sadness behind her eyes.

"We used to be smiling, smiling all the time. Everyday was like a dream. We'd go about our business like there was nothing better in the world. I loved coming home to my daughter and Jadine. She's named after me, my grand-daughter," the woman explained. "My daughter Alexandria and her lived with me after her husband died. We all learned together. Then the Genshj took her from me." Her voice turned bitter and she swallowed.

"I'm sorry." I said feebly. What do you say to someone who's been through that?

"Come young man," Her face brightened and she held out a hand. I took it cautiously. Her laugh was like a twinkling stream in my ears. "Come now! Don't be afraid of an old thing like me!" Her hands were very soft and I tossed her a lopsided grin as we sat down at a small table, surrounded by books and crystals.

"You don't look like you'd hurt a fly."

Again she laughed. "I don't suppose I would. But don't you worry, I know how to take care of myself."

"I don't doubt that." I told her.

"Now I know what you're here for. Let me commend you right now for getting as far as you did. I know how many odds were stacked against you. Thank you for letting Cordelia come with you. You and her positively _need_ this time together. I can assure you that you'll see a difference." she began. "Do you have the crystal with you?"

I blanched at her sudden knowledge of everything that had been happening in my life. As I was trying to decide whether or not I should ask how in the name of the world she knew this, I realized she had asked me a question.

I reached into my pocket and fished out the tiny jewel. The pea sized thing gleamed in the afternoon sun. I handed it to her, glad to have a least that off my hands.

She drew in a deep sigh and held it against her chest. Her eyes fluttered and I thought I saw some tears gathering in them. I unconsciously reached over and set a hand on her shoulder. She looked up.

"Is that what-" I began.

She smiled and gently pushed my arm away. I settled back down studying her face.

"You've made this old woman so happy. For years I've searched for this. Now that I have found it...my work is nearly done. But there are some things you should know." Her eyes bore into me and I squirmed uncomfortably, at her sudden dire tone. She was such a sweet old woman but her eyes were worse than Angel's.

_Angel!_

I closed my eyes for a moment, praying he'd be safe till I could get him out of there.

"Do not concern yourself with him." she interrupted quietly. "Angel will be fine. It isn't him they want. The young one wants you and the crystal. Raine wants your skull. You are the object of everyone's obsession. They are trying to lure you with him. When you come, Raine will trap you, torture you and he'll bring you to death's door. The young one will want more."

"More?" I whispered trembling.

"The Genshj do not like to kill the body first. They like to torture your soul. Haunt it with blackness till it's a weak thin illusion and you can no longer stop the dark. She wants to tear your soul to shreds and then kill you." the woman said. Her hands fingered the crystal almost lovingly. "You mustn't let go. Never let them feed you the lies they weave. They'll make you see the bad side, but you must remember that isn't all there is to you."

"How do you know this?" I croaked. My throat had suddenly gone dry.

She smiled, her eyes filled with pity. "It's what I was given. The power to see. I've watched you. I have also watched her. You need to save her, Allen."

"'Delia?" I gasped. My hands tightened to fists. "Will they hurt her?"

"I can't prevent that. No one can. I don't mean physically. I mean you need to save _her_. She's digging herself into a pit and she needs to be told that she doesn't have to stay there." Her eyes were shining with earnest. "She needs to be loved. Understood. Accepted. Let her be her. You've done well so far. Just let her figure it out for herself."

I took this all in and sighed shakily. "So what you're telling me is, this is all just a huge trap for her to kill my soul and Raine to get my skull? And now I also need to save not only Angel but Cordelia? What about the crystals?"

"This crystals are not something they will remember until late. While they beat you, they will want to know where the crystals are. You must keep them in a safe place. The spell will be started when you arrive." She mused.

I sighed heavily. "I thought you were the one who wanted them. How can I keep them safe of it's for sure I'll get beaten?"

The woman shook her head sadly. "That's what must happen. Please be careful. They won't kill Cordelia or Angel. You are all that matters to them and they see your friends as merely a tool. You have to guard these crystals with your life."

"Is the whole Genshj clan in on this?" I asked, feeling numb. I heard things about a clan who lived somewhere on Hofner and had huge numbers to them. I didn't much care to think about what might happen if I ran into them all.

"I only see five of them. Although there aren't many, be warned that they are extremely powerful. Raine will also be there. I see a bind of some kind between he and the young girl who wants you. They're working together." She glanced at the grand-father clock to the far side of the wall and her eyes widened. She leaned forward and thrust something into my hand.

She had given the crystal back to me. I stared at it uncomprehendingly. She fished around in her pockets and came out with something. She sprinkled it into my hand.

It was the other five crystals. They were all tiny like mine and sparkled with colour. I looked up.

"I will not survive today," She said quietly. "Raine will come in three minutes to capture the crystals of Mure. There will be demons to distract you. They will try to take Cordelia. I'll help you. There is a spell I can attempt that will save you all." Her eyes widened and I felt panic stab me in the chest. Before I could argue, or question, or attempt to digest this information she gasped. "They're here! Go Allen! Keep Cordelia safe and guard the crystals. You have to do the spell!"

I got up not knowing what I was doing. I could taste Cordelia's fear in my dry mouth and I stumbled half-way to the door not understanding half of what she had told me. I whirled around as she got up to follow, realizing what she had said..

"You can't die! I need you! Jadine needs you!"

"My time is done." She said calmly.

I stared at her, wondering for a second I didn't have to waste. "Who are you?" I rasped.

"Jade." She said. She gave me a push and I bolted out the door. I heard the crack of the wood hitting the wall as I ran. I saw Raine advancing on Cordelia. I screamed for her to get away and stumbled in between them. The crystals burned in my pocket and I felt so angry at everything that had been dumped on me I wanted to tear his throat out.

"Stay away from her Raine!" I snapped, my voice not my own. Cordy gripped my arm.

"Why should I, lad? You know my way. If I can't get you, I get your little play-toy." Raine cocked a gun I hadn't noticed towards Cordy and suddenly I couldn't stand it.

All the anger, fear and desperation inside me came out in the battle cry I released. I flew forward and tackled him to the ground. I felt a searing, burning, ripping pain in my arm and my ears rang with the gunshot. I ripped the gun from his hands ignoring the pain. I began to punch barely caring that I was out of my head. Raine was gaining the upper hand. I was losing so much blood. The pain was so bad. I'd never felt it before. I didn't see how he knocked me away. I just felt the pain as I hit the grass and saw him push Cordy into the fountain.

I hadn't even seen the demons holding her. They now held her thrashing body under the water. I wanted to move so badly. I couldn't get up. The blood flowed and flowed and I had to stop it before I passed out. I pressed my jacket against it and struggled to get up. The power of the cross necklace was failing me.

I can't describe the feeling of watching them drown her. I was outside of my body watching a nightmare. My whole heart felt ripped like I was dying with her. I hated myself at that moment more than ever, because I hadn't been able to prevent this from happening. I wanted to protect her from everything I couldn't and I felt tears burn my eyes as I screamed hoarsely for them to stop.

Suddenly, something caught my eye. On the porch, Jade was chanting and waving her hands. The clouds were now pink and red and orange like a sunset. They were swirling crazily. Jade screamed something. I could barely make out the words: _Save them! My work...is..._ Then I watched in horror as she dematerialized. I screamed again.

Then light burst in my eyes. The demons disappeared as flashes of light burned them into nothingness. I swear, the sky opened up and flashes came from the swirling colours. The demons wailed in pain and died. Raine ran off somewhere, screaming like a child. I couldn't even make him out.

I couldn't take it. The one person who could tell me what I had to do was dead. Jadine would blame me. The Genshj wanted me dead and to destroy the world. Angel wasn't here to help. I couldn't talk to anyone who would remotely understand. And now the woman I was now certain I loved with my entire soul could be gone too. She was limp.

Feeling sudden strength flow into me, I rushed to the fountain, sobs clogging my throat. Cordelia opened her eyes wide and sucked in air. She stared at me and I stared back never crying harder. I wanted to murder Raine for hurting her this way. She never looked so helpless, pale and fragile, like she'd break with a touch. She was always so strong...so together... Deciding then and there that I needed to protect her (whatever happened) I gathered her retching, shaking, gasping body in my arms.

"Delia," I choked. "I thought I was too late...I thought I lost you."

"Well you didn't," Her voice was froggy and barely audible. I never heard a sweeter sound. "I'm staying right here."

"Cripes love, you're frozen..." I kissed her forehead tenderly.

I don't know how I managed to her into the jeep. The pain in my arm was slowing me and her body felt like ice. I had to grit my teeth and ignore. I got her in the back with a blanket over her. Her eyes closed and her breathing was still labored. I got in and sat at the steering wheel.

As I shakily started the car, I caught a glimpse of me in the rearview. The wet, teary-faced stranger who stared back at me looked as if the whole world had come to an end. I saw my own pain at the back of my eyes. I'd never felt so alone.

I lowered my head in my hands and sobbed like a little boy.

***

I don't know how long I cried. My nose was stuffed and my head ached when I was all through. I drove to the hotel trying to control what was going on inside me. I needed to focus. Jade had said that I needed to do the spell. The Genshj would be weaving _their_ spell when I arrived at wherever they were. I needed to do the one that would stop theirs. The only problem was I had no clue where they were or how to attempt it. I didn't even know _when _I was expected to do it!

"You're hurt." A voice broke through my thoughts. Cordy was sitting up now all wrapped in the blanket. I kept my eyes on the road.

"I'll be alright." I lied.

"I'm patching you up." She told me.

"No, you're going to- " I began.

"No, you're going to not tell me what to do. I'm patching you up and that's it." Her voice was so full of conviction and my arm was in so much pain that I couldn't remember why I needed to stop her. "You saved my life. If I don't-"

"Cordelia," My voice faltered and I sighed. "I don't have the strength to argue with you."

She smiled slightly. "Like you could stop me, anyway."

When we sat down on the couch, Cordy took her time fixing me up. She was so gentle, like she thought I would break if she touched me. It was sweet. I liked being the center of her attention for a change. I didn't want her to think that she was the reason the bullet had ripped my arm open, but I could see it when she looked at me. She bit her lip and her eyes glazed over everytime she looked at the wound.

It wasn't too deep surprisingly. I thought it had gone clear through my arm but by some miracle the bullet hadn't gone in me at all. It bled quite alot even so, and by the time it was all wrapped up, Cordy was covered in it.

"Doyle," She looked me in the eye. She was trembling. "Bad things are coming aren't they?"

I nodded. "Really bad things."

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Chapter Twelve: The Grief

Cordelia

Doyle insisted he be the one to tell Jadine about her grand-mother. He looked so vulnerable and small as we drove back to the cottage. I wished that he had never found the woman. She'd nearly gotten us both killed. I was still a bit cold after hours of sitting wrapped in a few blankets, listening to Doyle toss and turn in his room.

I'd had to give him an asprin for the pain. Who knows how some asprin got into our cabin, but I found some. Luckily it wasn't expired. It knocked him out though. He must've had so many awful dreams...

Jadine screamed when he told her. Doyle's voice had cracked and broke as he spoke. When he was finished she just howled. Her eyes filled with tears and she gave Doyle a good hard smack in the face. He reeled back and I caught him, hoping he hadn't hit his arm. Then neither one of us could take our eyes off Jadine.

She was enraged. Doyle tried to console her, to grab her, anything, but she was beyond that. Her eyes were nearly black with grief and rivers flowed down her cheek as she began throwing things.

I dodged the little knick-knacks and tried to salvage what I could knowing she'd want them later.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU PROTECT HER? YOU PROMISED ME! YOU _PROMISED_ ME!!" She wailed.

Doyle finally caught hold of her and gathered her in his arms. She collapsed against him, melting in tears. I watched, the lump in my throat too big to ignore.

"Shhh," Doyle whispered in her ear. "It'll be alright..."

"She's all I have..." Jadine kept choking.

I never saw anyone as good with a griever as Doyle. He seemed to be calming her and she got quiet, finally just giving in to the tears. Her hands trembled on his neck. His hands stroked her back soothingly. I tore my eyes away from the tight embrace and walked into the kitchen.

The afternoon sun illuminated the tiny space in an orangey tint. I watched the waves at the beach swish against the shore. I think I stood there much longer than I realized. I just got lost in the rhythm. It was nice to know that on this tiny chaotic island there was one thing that remained peaceful and untouched. I wanted to be lying there, feeling the waves touch my toes. The one thing that made me most want this to be over was Doyle. Too much responsibility was being thrust upon him. I wished I could stop the guilt I saw flooding behind those eyes. All I could do was be there.

Suddenly, Doyle was there beside me, looking exhausted and drained. He set a hand on my shoulder and I put my own over his.

"How is she?" I didn't recognize my own voice. I coughed, trying to clear my throat.

"Better. She said she wanted to be alone. I think we should come back later," Doyle glanced behind him, hand still tightly grasping mine. "We still need her help."

I didn't ask what for, even though I wanted to. I was a bit taken by how we were holding hands and not even thinking twice about it. It still sent a sizzle through me when we touched. It was different now. Kinda like I was completely comfortable with him. I'd never really felt that with anyone. It was special but felt normal. I felt disconcerted. I knew I should be worried about Jadine, and I was to a degree, but I still felt a lingering distrust for her.

We walked out to the jeep (which Jadine had told us pre-old woman's death was ours since she'd be getting a new one) in silence. I sat in the front, shaken by the amount of Doyle's blood that still remained there. He glanced apologetically at me.

"I'll clean that sometime." He promised. "But you may need to get used to seeing it."

"Shut-up Doyle," I said numbly. "That's not going to happen."

"Princess, you haven't seen the hatred I have." Doyle replied resolutely. "Jadine was more angry than she was grieving. Anger always comes first with people. Raine hates me. The Genshj hate me..."

"I don't," I broke in, just as firmly. "And neither does Angel."

"Angel," Doyle closed his eyes briefly in pain as we stopped at a red light. "Hope he's ok."

I instantly felt horrible. Why did I have to mention his name? He had enough to worry about! I lowered my head in defeat and resigned myself to just sitting and looking out the window. I desperately wanted to reassure him somehow, but I knew I couldn't do anything more just yet.

"Cordy, what do you think they're doing to him?" Doyle's voice nearly broke. Before I had a chance to answer he started again, his eyes darkening and his hands tightening on the wheel. "If they lay a hand on him...heads are gonna roll!!"

I don't think he even realized how scary that sounded when he looked like that. I never thought I would ever be afraid of Doyle. But at that moment, I wanted to jump out of the car. The silent anger in him was choking me.

***

He slept a few more minutes when we got back. Then I heard him tossing and turning yet again. He couldn't even stay asleep.

I had made myself some soup I found. Though it wasn't a very expensive motel, it still had that little welcome basket. I found it on top of one of the cupboards. Apparently, we didn't even notice it.

The warm broth tasted like onions and beef. It was surprisingly comforting as I sat on the couch, my legs crossed Indian style. I felt so out of place. What could I possibly do while Doyle slept? I could've watched a documentary on dolphins (boring), slept (out of the question) or just sat there (which is what I ended up doing). It wasn't a great variety.

Finally, a knock at the door roused Doyle and startled me. He walked out of his room rubbing his eyes. I answered the door tossing my empty bowl onto the table.

Jadine let herself in before I could even blink. She was carrying about seven or eight books which were all huge and dusty. Doyle rushed to help her set them down.

"Come in." I muttered bewilderedly.

The hysterical girl I had seen back at the house was gone. Jadine was all business now. Her eyes were red-rimmed and she sniffed non-stop, but a firm determination replaced the desperation. I stayed close, but a safe distance away as she began talking.

"Ok, I found the books we need. All we have to do is find the spell that will bind the magic. One person can do it and only one. I'll have to be the one to perform the very end of the spell," She said briskly. "It's very complex and-"

"But why?" Doyle interrupted, his voice still sleepy and confused. "I thought I was-"

"I won't let you!" Jadine snapped. "You're not worthy and it wouldn't work if someone like you even_ tried!_"

Doyle shut his mouth and muttered an apology, looking wounded. Anger rose in me, but I held in hoping it was just her grief talking.

She turned back to the text. "Anyway, as I was saying, I need all the crystals with me and a Ferris Orb. The basics I already have. Just some spices and leaves etc. I still need the orb though. We have to perform it on the sight that the other ritual is being attempted. This is gonna be tricky so if you can control the demons, _princess_ and I can finish it up."

"Her names Cordelia." Doyle put in, looking a bit annoyed at her sarcasm. She was mocking both of us.

"Yeah," She muttered. "Brilliant name." She closed the book and turned her back to me. "Now give me crystals."

"Now?" asked Doyle, looking perplexed.

"I can't trust you to take care of anything!" She snapped bluntly.

I'd had enough.

"Listen-" I growled, advancing toward her.

"Cord-" Doyle tried to put his hand on my shoulder but I batted it away. This was just too far.

"Shut-up Doyle." I turned to the girl, who looked a bit taken aback.

"I know that you're grieving right now. And I'm sorry about your grandma. I really am!" Jadine flinched and I plowed on. "But Doyle is only trying to help. You don't know anything about him or the things that he does. He is worthy of much more than what he's been stuck with! And he_ didn't_ kill her! Doyle would have died to protect her and I know that!" I stopped for a moment shocked at what was coming out of me, but knowing it was right. Jadine closed her eyes, tears leaking out.

"Look I am sorry...I just can't stand you talking to him that way." I half-whispered, lowering my head. I felt his eyes on me, but I couldn't bring myself to look at him. "You can trust him."

Jadine sighed. "I'm not going to be easy to work with ok? Just...just understand."

She looked at us as if we were supposed to accept it. I didn't want to. In someway I understood why she was acting this way, but I couldn't stand how much it hurt him. He was right about hate always coming first. She almost hated Doyle thinking that it was his carelessness that killed her grandma. I felt gutted as I listened to the rest of the conversation.

Doyle mentioned Kevin could get him an orb. He called him quickly and after yelling a bit they seemed to agree to meet a mile out of town. Jadine said she'd stay with me so we could research the spell. I desperately didn't want him to go. I couldn't be alone with her right then and I trusted this Kevin guy about as far as I could throw him. I didn't know how long the necklaces were going to hold out either. They didn't block out gunshots or flesh wounds. They just gave strength.

I sat up as Jadine went to the bathroom and he headed towards the door. I grabbed his arm. I think I actually blushed when he looked at me. I hated doing that.

"Don't go." I whispered.

"Delia, I have to. We need the orb and Kevin can get me one." His eyes were so gentle and his hands soft as he brushed the hair from my eyes.

"But what if he does something? What if he gets you a fake one or he maims or shoots you? In the head this time? Alot of good you'll do us dead!" I was freaking myself out now, my eyes pleading with his. I hated how resolved he'd become. I couldn't break him anymore.

"I'm willing to die for you." He interrupted steadily.

My eyes widened and my breath caught. I didn't want that. That was the last gift I'd ever want. Certain I was going to cry, I bit my lip.

"Shut-up." was all I could manage. I lowered my head again and leaned my forehead onto his chest.

His hands were shaking slightly as he tipped my face up. I felt transfixed as he gazed into me.

"We never get our moment do we?" he murmured.

Then he did something I never expected.

He grabbed me around the waist and pulled me towards him. His lips came down so quick I barely registered what was happening. Our lips just fit perfectly. It was one of those movie moments where everything slid into a blur and we weren't in this chaos, just somewhere peaceful and perfect. The kiss was deep and desperate and I clung to him, almost wanting to sob when he let me go.

He didn't look back as he ran to the jeep. I don't think he could've left if he had.

A funny realization dawned on me as I stood in the doorway, dazed and in love.

I hadn't looked at myself in the mirror once that day.

I didn't care.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________


End file.
